Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Passing Thoughts on a Day Filled with Emotion and Recollection

Hello Aspierations Friends,

I could use one of these right about now.  How about you?

If you read my blog from last night, Remembering Robbie Tanaka and my Bowling Days with the JCCB, you got a glimpse into my bowling past as I reminisced about my junior club tournament days and appreciation for a very special tournament director who was an amazing ambassador for junior bowling. 

Today I received a few emails and blog comments from bowling buddies and fellow tournament attendees from back in the day.  I was able to positively reconnect with people from the past who helped make those days so fond for me.  Even in Robbie's passing, he was able to bring junior bowlers together again. He will certainly be missed and remembered fondly.

I had a high school classmate pass away suddenly in early March, Kimberly Kading. She was well liked, popular and bright and although we didn't travel in the same social circles, academically we had some overlaps and I felt her loss as well.  If you're happening into my blog through search and were a friend of Kim's, a high school classmate and friend of mine set up a nice tribute page to her on Facebook and anyone who knew her is welcome to "like" the page and share their thoughts, special memories or pictures.

I'll admit that I don't have much experience with the passing of people I know who I'd consider my peers.  I've had grandparents pass away but I'm blessed to have my parents both still alive at 80 and my birthfamily (I'm adopted) all seems to be doing fairly well.  My husband John lost his maternal grandma last year and an uncle a few years before that but he hasn't had too much experience with death either and he comes from a rather large family comparative to mine.

Death hits all of us differently as does the realization of our own mortality.  "Treat every day as a gift from God. That's why we call it the present."  I heard this as a child and it stuck with me then, initially because I appreciated the play on words.  Later, it meant more as I was able to come to appreciate the life I have been given.  My sons who are 11 1/2 and almost 5 think it's clever and even though there are more eloquent and elaborate ways to share the moral of the message, if it helps empower them, then why not share it?


Speaking of sharing... I have written and rewritten this part of my blog (below the asterisks) about a dozen times.  I went ahead and deliberately hit the delete button just a moment ago because I still was not satisfied with what I was trying to convey.  

Of course you wouldn't have known that if I hadn't shared but since I haven't deleted this sentence yet, I guess the secret is out.

Tonight does not feel like one of my finer writing nights.  My mind has been racing with so many different thoughts and I feel pulled in many different directions.  I need to take a break, get a few hours sleep, tackle my work for tomorrow and then come back here again, hopefully with a clearer vision about what I want to convey.

I had intended to finish this blog sharing some resources with you about how to help children and adults on the autism spectrum make sense of death but then I came to realize that every time I clicked on a link that I googled or read through a PDF file, I was saddened.  I go through my own grief cycles with the boys and myself and perhaps the emotions I'm feeling right now are not conducive to me providing the best insight or advice.

I'll have to think that through as well as I do think sharing raw emotion often leads to a greater understanding of how to relate to the world around me.

In the interim, here is one of the links I found useful.  Perhaps you will as well!

Admittedly, I'm not much in the mood to write right now and since it's almost midnight and I still need to post a blog for the 13th, I'll go ahead and end here.

Incidentally, if you're happening into my blog for the first time, today's writing is probably not the best first impression of what Aspierations is all about so please check out some of my earlier postings as well.  You can find them on the right side or check out a recent recap here:

Until next time,

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