Happy Friday, Aspierations Friends!
For those of you who work Monday - Friday jobs or go to school during the week, I would imagine TGIF would apply to you today. I remember those days... It has been awhile!
Tonight I am here at home alone with Justin and Ryan. Justin is on the computer creating videos and Ryan is on the floor actively engaged with his cars. It has been 5 minutes since anyone has urgently needed "nice Mommy" or "sweetie-heart" so I'm going to try and type quickly! I can't guarantee the quality of the content right now as I'm feeling a bit downcast.
John is off doing Scoutmaster Leadership Training at a place called "Optimist Camp" and won't be back until tomorrow evening. It is supposed to rain tonight and tomorrow so I'm not sure how optimistic everyone there will be feeling after their campout but hopefully they'll all get what they need out there and will leave feeling positive.
It seems like John has been gone a lot lately for scouting training, events and overnights. This is a way he feels he wants to serve and so I try my best to support him by taking care of the kids and business while he is away. I'll admit that sometimes it seems like it takes up an awful lot of time in comparison to the other things we as a family are trying to get accomplished but marriage and family is about a lot of compromise and being a scout leader is something that John has stated many times is very important to him. He has often expressed disappointment in not having scouting opportunities available to him as a kid past 2nd or 3rd grade and he wants to give this chance to both Justin who is now in Boy Scouts and Ryan who will qualify for Tiger Cub status in two years. I want John to be happy and live out his goals and dreams and so I try to encourage and support those ambitions, especially when they have healthy and positive intentions. It also gives him a chance to socialize and get outside of these walls and I'm sure having adult conversation with someone other than me is something he looks forward to. Of course, I'd like to say that I'm entertaining but I realize he needs more and I want him to have that socialization chance. There are certainly a lot of worse things he could be into although if I'm not careful, I feel I'll lose him to Farmville and/or Farm Story soon. (It's an online game that he and his mother and now Justin like to play.)
I am optimistic that someday when Aspierations takes off like I'd like it to and I have the opportunity to travel for speaking and workshops, he will be willing to occasionally stay with the kids by himself as well. We have talked in the past about Aspierations being something we could work together on as a team and a family. I look forward to that one day coming to fruition.
I'll admit, I'd love to be able to apply many hours to developing Aspierations right now but between the kiddos and work and everyday marriage and family stuff, I feel lucky to be able to get in an evening blog every couple of nights. This is the time of year for our online etail business Count Your Beans Dolls & Gifts that is totally make or break so a lot of hours need to be naturally be put in since Christmas shopping season is right around the corner.
(Hang on - meltdown time!!!! Not me... yet...)
I'm back... situation resolved. One kiddo back at the computer, one kiddo in the purple chair eating Chex Mix. Life is good again and the meltdown was a relatively short one. Hooray! :-)
Developing Aspierations into something larger than just this blog has been a goal of mine since the beginning of the year but the kiddos, family and paying bills are obviously large priorities. As I've mentioned in this blog before, I have felt called by God to work on Aspierations so it disappoints me that I have not been savvy enough to figure out a better way to balance everything. I really don't want to let anyone down. I don't want to disappoint my family, my parents, God, myself or my Aspierations friends.
I guess I'll pray on it and hopefully tomorrow will be a better day.
Right now I guess I'm just feeling a bit lonely and overwhelmed. Lots of work to do, so I guess I'll try and get back to that. If I can get the boys to bed at a reasonable hour tonight, I may come back to blogging but if not, I'll try and catch up with you guys and gals this weekend. I really don't need to drag anyone down with me. I do want you to come back again, after all!
Anyone out there have any fun and exciting weekend plans? Please feel free to share them! I'd enjoy hearing something cheery!
Best wishes to all of you!